attention seeking hornse

2026-05-02

What are my plans for this site? I’m planning to do monthly posts at least for journal entries. I’ve burned through sites before by posting nonstop for a week then abandoning ship. So I’m trying a different way this time

I like keeping journals. I have tons in real life plus scattered files across my devices. I think that’s part of what social anxiety does to you. But this one’s public and I keep asking myself why even make it public? The answer is simple but cringe and unsatisfactory every time

I recently finished reading ‘i’m thinking of ending things’ and it opened with this idea about how we can fake what we say and what we do, but not our thoughts. We can’t fake our thoughts

And I think part of what makes writing hard is that it isn’t some secondary thing that happens after our thoughts. Writing is an act of thinking

So this site is as honest as I can get with a potential someone, at least until I can afford a therapist, or something